"to identify ego and recognize its existence
is the first major step in spirituality"
Part - 5
Some claim the ego to be non-existent. It is like some darkness which does not have existence. So no need to fight it out. While it saves your breath of the unwanted warfare waged, it also makes the seeker ignore the fact that without darkness, there is no light possible.
Disciple : But the idea of ego as
darkness sounds fantastic!
Master : Yes, very fanciful. Appears to have
solved all the tough times ahead !
Disciple : Whats the problem in such a thinking?
Master : Nothing much except you have to
live with a big lie all your life !
Disciple : A lie ? How is that ?
Master : When you deny the existence of ego
then you may have to dismiss yourself as
non existent every time you see your
face on the mirror and should be
able stop looking and admiring
it on the mirror.
disciple : What happens to me if I
consider the ego as non-existent?
Master : Then you are likely to create more
confusion in this world than the traffic
system on the roads of India.
It is not in the absence of ego you attain fulfillment but only in its total connectivity with its source called as consciousness (Atman, Godlikeness)any possible fulfillment happens.
Disciple : You often mention about fulfillment.
Is it the same as awakening ?
Master : Yes. Ego is half filled. When connected
to consciousness it becomes fully filled.
Disciple : So fulfilment is not possible without ego/
Master : Precisely. Only consciousness alone cannot be full !
Disciple : How come ? I thought to be an ego is
half filled and when the ego is renounced and
realizing the consciousness is fulfillment ?
Master : That's the appalling understanding of
anything even remotely called as spiritual!
Disciple : Oh, where am I going wrong ?
Master : You are incorrect when you say that
Consciousness is full and ego is half full, in fact
when consciousness connect to the ego
then only it becomes full.
Disciple :Please give me an example !
Master : The root is like consciousness.
The tree is like ego. Root alone is
incomplete and tree alone is incomplete.
But root and tree together is complete !
Disciple : I got it !
Master : Hopefully, yes !
The Atman or the consciousness is the essence and the ego is its expression. They work hand in glove. They support each other actually. while consciousness does not withdraw the support, the ego somewhere forgets that it is only an expression and still worse, it starts to believes itself to be independent of the Consciousness. That severed ties with the consciousness causes untold pain and sorrow to the ego. That's when it start its much hyped soul searching process.
Disciple : Now it makes sense. Spirituality is to
re-establish the lost contact with Consciousness?
Master : Though you speak of it like meeting some
old friend, it almost amounts to the same!
In this process, if ego is told that there is no existence of ego, then it can cause serious problems to the seeking of the ego. It would lead to the stupid imaginations of ego to be consciousness itself. It would abandon any further seeking which rules out the possibilities of reunion between ahamkar (ego, jiva, individual self, expression of the consciousness) and Atman.
Disciple : Why should the ego connect to this consciousness ?
Master : Why should you go back home at the end of the day ?
Disciple : Sometimes I don't feel like going home at all !
Master : But you may want to consider some other place as home.
As long you need a home like place to eat and sleep,
then the need for the ego also is to come home
and find the restfulness.
Disciple : What about you ? you don't seem to have a home,
but still you appear fulfilled ?
Master : I may not have a home but I feel homely wherever I am.
But the need for a home is common to every thing in creation.
Even a ascetic will make a home out of some cave in the
mountains and try to feel restful there. The monks
consider the monastery as home. Even gods
appear to have a hometown and a temple
or a church to live with
strict working hours !
This homecoming for the ego is called as self awareness. It need not even come back to home. But just it needs to realize that it has a home and abiding in it makes its life complete and fulfilled.